Manhunter

Man alive what a creepy movie. The first in the Hannibal Lector series, and why this has gotten far less recognition than Silence of the Lambs is beyond me. You know the story- Crazy killer on the loose, FBI agent assigned to the case, help from another crazy killer is greatly appreciated. Instead of the somewhat comical effect of SOTL, Manhunter is atmospheric, chilling, and realistic, with scenes weird enough to make the hair on your neck stand up (See below picture. EWWWWW). A much better and more menacing Hannibal Lector (played by Brian Cox) is quite an improvement and chatty William Peterson owns the film no matter how much he talks to himself. One of those few eighties stylized films that actually work! (***1/2 out of ****)

The Night Listener

Laid-out like a cheesy made for TV film, this ridiculous, sometimes laughable "suspense" movie is a 91 minute bore-a-thon that features inept small-town folks, a corrupt cop with a taser stick thing, and some ugly handmade sweaters. Robin Williams plays a homosensual writer who becomes fascinated with a young boy's story of childhood sex abuse. His guardian is a whacked-out blind lady played by Toni Collette. While talking with the two only over the phone, he begins to ask himself some questions. Is he getting the whole story? Is this a fraud? Are there really two people? Did people actually think this was going to be a good movie after watching the dailies? Okay, that was one of my questions. With loose ends hanging in the cosmos of boredom, the last frame fades with one of the stupidest, cheapest endings to date. It wasn't really even an ending. It was more like the crew ran out of film and had to make do with what they had. But the absolute worst part of the film was one of the early scenes showing in graphic detail the perverse child molestation of the young boy, almost exploiting an unthinkable evil into a cheap thrill. Stupid, disgusting, and a waste of time. (*out of ****)

Duel

Steven Speilberg so shone in this hour of glory and brilliance with the twisted cat-and-mouse tale that made me swear I will never mess with truck drivers again. Maybe not what most would consider a horror film, but it sure scares me. A working man (played by wonderfully talkative Dennis Weaver, R.I.P) is on his way to the salt mines when he suddenly finds himself the target of a truck driver's sick little game. Action-packed and thrill-filled, this is definately one for any DVD collection. And make sure to look for an accidental cameo by Speilberg himself (you can see him in a pane of glass with the camera.) Now now, he was just starting out! (***1/2 out of ****)

The Wicker Man

In this extremely overrated cult favorite, Edward Woodward plays the devote Christian police officer investigating the disaperence of a young girl. His search leads him to a pagen cult inhabiting a sceneic coastal town. The citizen's carefree, hedonistic escapades are of stark contrast to Woodward's Bible- thumping lifestyle. They gallop about devoid of clothing, freak dance in rowdy bars and keep roaches on leashes in desks (I'm not making that up, I swear). With deeper investigation, he sees the cult is much more sinister than their flower-child facde. A fab-o performance from P.I.M.P Woodward saves this from the lowest rating, but the film as a whole still ceases to impress. Cinefantastique states this movie as being "the 'Citizen Kane' of horror films". LIES!!!! (*1/2 out of ****)

Phantasm

Fun campy horror film with a Sci-Twist. Angus Scrimm is "The Tall Man", a creepy gangly guy complete with sharp spheres to b-slap the oblivious and the strength of Superman!! When a young boy finds himself the witness to the Tall Man's sinister plans, you've got yourself a good old-fashioned showdown. Cheesey? Yes. Silly? Of course, but still lots of fun. Watch with the lights off and pray to God this guy isn't behind you-



(**1/2 out of ****)

Ghost Ship

Think "The Amityville Horror" on the high seas. So bad it begs the question, "what were they thinking?"-



(* out of ****)

Deep Red

Another film from Dario Argento, this is a very psychological movie, throwing unexpected twists and unpredictable turns. Although too much talking and time between scares may be a little disapointing to you, and the cutesiness of Daria Nicolodi can be somewhat nerve-gratting. And while it lacks the colorful atmosphere of "Suspiria", it certainately keeps a tense, unsettling enviornment and is a very unique and creepy film. I can't really tell you the plot line since I'm afraid I'll ruin it for you, but I can tell you if psychological horror is your thing, this is right up your alley. And the last few minutes just creeped me the heck out. AKA "Profondo Rosso" (*** out of ****)

Demons

Random people walking the streets get handed tickets to a movie theater for a late- night film. Soon people become infected with a virus turning them into zombies, while the innocent ones are trapped inside. Violent, dark and somewhat ridiculous, it's 88 minutes of throat-ripping, head-tearing, stomach-impaling, growth-bursting, eye-gouging, helicopter-crashing, pimp-slaying madness. By no means a classic, or one you'll hardly remember, but if you're up at 3:00 suffering from insomnia, you could do worse. Produced by Dario Argento and directed by Lamberto Bava. AKA "Dèmoni". (** out of ****)

Candyman

Set in the ghetto of Chicago, this intense horror film took me totally by surprise with it's quality. After a couple murders have happened without a suspect, people begin to believe "the Candyman", a supernatural killer with a bloody-stump-hook-hand and a voice deeper than a league is responsible for the grusome murders. When an a rich, ivy league student is writing a thesis on urban legends, she interviews believers in the Candyman's power. While through the process she brushes it off as silly folklore, she learns that there's more to the story than she thought. So many creepy visuals will stay with you long after it's ended. NOT for the squemish, but right up your ally if you like blood and quality scares. Oh yeah, don't watch this right before bed. I, um, learned that the hard way. (*** out of ****)

Darkness

Following in the masterful shoes of "Suspiria", I'm almost ashamed to give this pathetic film room on my blog. Yet another ridiculous supernatural film about a haunted house and all the usual clichés that come with them. Just reviewing this was a waste of time, but what can I say, I'm bored. (minus ******* out of ****)

Suspiria

From the genius mind of legendary Italian horror director Dario Argento comes "Suspiria", taking you well beyond the average slasher flick and into a gruesome art form. A young American dancer travels from New York to a conservatory to study ballet. She arrives late on a rainy night,and unable to get in, stays the night elsewhere. Much to her fortune, she missed being the target of a cold-blooded killer. Unlike any horror film you will ever see, "Suspiria" mixes macabre death sequences with vibrant colors, "Kubrick-esque" camera shots and one of the most chilling musical scores in cinema, it's reputed as being a "terrifying acid trip", and since I have never been on an acid trip myself, I'll have to take their word for it. (**** out of ****)

It

Falling into the "so bad it's good" category, this is one of the better films adapted from a Stephen King novel (yeah, they're usually terrible). The sassy, deceptive clown Pennywise is in your drains, kids!! And despite what he says about floating if you join him in his lair (whatever the hell that means), you won't, you'll just die. He's a tricky man, using ballons and other sorts of circus entertainment as deadly bait to lure down children to their death. Especially stupid kids like Georgie. He was defeated, I swear he was defeated, by the most annoying group of pre-teen children I've ever seen in a movie. But was he really defeated? Of course not. The group reunites years later to find themselves facing Sir Pennywise one again, only this time he has shed his goody-goody clown look and is now a giant spider. That's no joke. (** out of ****)

Frailty

Another great, overlooked horror film. Bill Paxton directed and also stars in this Hitchcockian mind teaser about murder, betrayal and faith (sounds juicy, doesn't it?). Paxton plays "Dad", nameless Dad, who believes to have gotten commands from God to destroy "demons", and must enlist the help of his sons. Sounds fun, but the demons appear to be regular people you'd see walking down the street. The youngest son, Adam, is all game, but older, non-believing son Fenton sees the demon destruction as murder. Those teens and their rebelious stages! Very well shot, acted and a very nice scene of Matthew McConaughey (you'll know when you see it) makes the film a must see. Watch to the end for big twist. (**** out of ****)

Alice, Sweet Alice

Brooke Sheilds made her film debut in this cheesy film about a girl so jealous of her younger sister that she resorts to murder to get back the limelight. A disturbing story that could have made for some fun entertainment, but instead should be thrown into the soon to be forgotten bin. The only creepy part is the obese pedophile who lives downstairs and eats cat food. Also known as "Communion"(* out of ****)

Motel Hell

"Meat's meat and man's gotta eat!" Never have words so eloquently flowed in a horror screenplay. This gory horror comedy (I've been reviewing alot of those lately) stars western god Rory Calhoun as Farmer Vincent, a kindly old farmer making a killing, well many killings, selling his famous smoked sausages to unsuspecting customers. His special ingredient is, as you probably guessed, human flesh. He actually keeps his victims lined up in rows like heads of cabage, it's wild!! Grotesque, macabre, and hysterically funny horror story is definately not one for the squemish, but definately worth watching for those who like lots of blood with their laughs. Look for the DVD two pack with Deranged. (**** out of ****)

Dead Alive

There are many different words to describe this New Zealand cult classic- Funny, bloody and ridiculous just to name a few. But there's not that one special word to sum it all up. It's reputation as being the goriest film of all time is definately something not many can contridict. It's make-up effects are some of the best you can see. Director Peter Jackson uses heavy tounge-in-cheek techniques to play down the over-the-top gore, which make for some hysterical scenes (Remember the photobook.). While there are of course some pretty silly, and somtimes stupid, moments, this is overall loads of fun. (***1/2 out of ****)

Jeepers Creepers

Awful film about a supernatural creature with a really bad make-up job. That's all I have to say. (* out of ****)

Evil Dead

With the reference to this film in my "Hills Have Eyes" review, I've decided to pay homage to one my favorite horror films of all time. *deep breath* Let us begin.....

A group of friends travel deep into the woods to spend a weekend at a ramshackle cabin. Things are fine until Ash's (Bruce Campbell) girlfriend is.......don't read if you're easily disturbed, but do if you like a laugh........raped by the woods. Yes raped by the woods. What these crazy kids didn't know about the cabin is the evil spirts lurking within. Great film with tounge-in-cheek horror, terrific make-up effects and Bruce Campbell to top it all off!! A true classic (****out of ****)

Deranged

This ultra-low budget film showcasing Ed Gein's downward spiral and ultimate fall to the dark side is eerily depicted in this creepy cult film. Roberts Blossom (remember Marley from Home Alone?), plays Ezra Cobb, the ficticious character inspired by Gein, in a chilling performance. Living with his overbearing and controling mother has given him a distorted view on the world, women in particular. You know the story, but probably haven't seen the movie. Although I did find the news reporter who narrated the story to be somewhat unnatural. Other than that, it's a very unappreciated horror film.

I haven't seen it anywhere available for to rent, but you can find it on double feature DVD with "Motel Hell" (another classic!!) for around $10. Buy it, you won't be dispointed. Except if you don't like it. Excuse me for sounding cliché, but great for a rainy Friday night. (*** out of ****)

The Hills Have Eyes (1977)

I am stunned, absolutely stunned from this film. Not in a good way like after a viewing of Sam Rami's low-budget masterpiece "Evil Dead", but on the contrary of the that unbridled ecstasy. How a movie this bad, this cheesy, this unscary, and this incomprihensibly terrible could be one of the genre's most praised works, is a mystery wrapped inside an enigma.

A family of city folk set off for a car trip through the rocky desert and crash their car off the road, making their car unusable (wow, that could have been better written). They run into a family of mountain freaks who seem to have gotten their clothes from the "Land of the Lost" prop department. And with this comes the usual mix of gunshots, stabbings and burnings at the stakes. Not a single scare in the 89 minute muck. The tagline is "The lucky ones died first". No, the lucky ones just don't see this movie. (* out of ****)